What’s My Recipe for Feeling Good?
Self-care and finding the right “recipe” for feeling good is vital for one’s wellbeing. Like a cooking recipe, there is not one ingredient that makes me feel good, fulfilled, healthy, safe, etc. My self-care recipe is made up of many ingredients. This recipe works best when I use regularly, if not daily, instead of something that is done after I already feel bad. Think of it a daily vitamin rather than an as needed medication like Tylenol for a headache. Whenever I feel off, if I take a second to evaluate where different aspects of my life are I have found there is always one what is out of whack. Either I have been spending time with emotionally unsafe people, I haven’t been living in line with my values, I haven’t connected with a Higher Power, etc. To begin exploring what might need to be in your personal self-care recipe, try this exercise out.
Pick an object that represents you and place it on your desk or the floor, wherever you will be doing this exercise. Next, take 12 slips of scrap paper, and write one thing on each piece
3 emotionally safe people in your life (write one name on each slip)
Your concept of a Higher Power (1)
2 hobbies you enjoy (write one hobby on each slip)
A place you go to get better/more information (podcasts, support groups, sponsor, books, internet articles) (1)
3 Values you live by (write one value on each slip)
Relaxation that does not include consuming substances/media/spending (1)
Movement you enjoy (1)
If there are any you aren’t sure about, just write a question mark on that slip of paper. It will look like: “Emotionally safe person #3?” or “Value #3?”
Next, place your slips around the object you picked to represent you.
It could look something like this:
*This exercise is loosely based on the 8 dimensions of wellness, or the Wellness Wheel https://www.unh.edu/health/wellness-wheel
What you have created in this exercise is not only a picture of your strengths but also a picture of what’s in your right recipe for feeling good. No one’s recipe is like someone else’s. One person’s idea of relaxation may feel like stress city to someone else. The slips of paper with the question marks are the parts of your recipe that may be missing and need some tending to.
If I cannot think of three emotionally safe people, that may be why I am surrounded by people but still feel lonely. If I am in a recovery program but struggling with the concept of a Higher Power, that may be why I feel disconnected from my recovery. The question marks serve as a guide, something to begin working on or exploring in therapy. Other parts of your recipe may include how many hours you work, what type of work you do, medication, boundaries, etc. Feel free to add in other concepts to your recipe. If you’d like help in exploring and creating your self-care recipe, give us a call. We’d love to support you in adjusting or creating yours.
Trusting the process,
Jessica